Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts

Monday, April 27, 2015

Obvious Trouble with Current Accepted Disability Advocacy; Pointing Out What is Wrong!

Having a disability and being able to identify this.  My son has taught me a lot about this.  It is a very touchy subject.   There is an advantage to saying I have blank.  When a person goes to Secondary Education and asking for the help that is needed means naming your disability.
Consider these things about having to say I have blank.  How many people like being singled out?  Do you want to be known for being different or having a disability?  Did you want to belong to specific groups?  How many realize the peer pressure teens with disabilitiies face?  Are called stupid or dumb for going to Lab Class for help?   Going through all these issues at or during adolescent? Recall Freak Shows at the Fair and Circues?  
Many teens and people in general with a disability see themselves as being flawed.  A number of those in this population feel like naming their disability means something is wrong with them.  A few might consider themselves less than whole.  
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This is my son Tanner Mack Adcock.  Every time I have tried to teach him about his disability and to name it; he gets upset.  He doesn't want to be known as a person with a disability.  He is adamant he doesn't have a disability. Being in an inclusive Oklahoma History, one incentive for him to do good without any accommadations is to be able to stay in the classroom and take tests or whatever. If a child or teen goes to lab for help he might be labled as Retarded. 
Another issue I have with what is considered correct Disability Advocacy deals with having teens lead their IEP meetings.  This can be an awful amount of pressure for a teen.  What teenager really knows what they want to do? Would we consider letting those labeled "normal" lead a class?  Be in charge of more?  Actually when I taught high school Biology I had teens present a paper, be video taped and have the so called authority of teaching the class.  Their material was on my test. I gave them what I got.  Which was asking to go to the bathroom and such.  
Please understand, I believe that the interests of the teen are paramount.  I only feel that direction of the meeting needs to be left in the hands of adults and direct the teens in having a meeting that covers all the things that should be done for him.  Trust me how many teens declare a college major and end up with that being their final degree path?  More should be expected from these teens.
How many teens with disabilities go on to be successful?  How many owe that to a parent that has pushed the teen to contiue exploriong a path?  Looking at jobs and pushing the teen to continue on in career or other?
Had I to do it over, I would been less about my son saying he has autism and more about him understanding when to ask for help.  Then I would have explained more about how some people have specific needs and identified the people like President George Washington had huge spelling problems but overcame them.  I would explain that people that have challenges need assistance and by understanding that this label may mean you can overcome this with a specific thing.
Does everybody know that a Blind person needs a cane or that a cane greatly increases his/her ability to get around? search  Do we keep telling a person that is Blind to identifiy his disability or spend more time teaching him to use a cane to get around?  How much time do we spend on teaching a person that needs a wheelchair that he has a mobility disability? search-1   Or, do we concentrate on teaching him/her to use the wheelchair to get aroud?  
If I could go back and do it over; I would center my time and energy on teaching my son to grasp his needs to master challenges in life and be able to communicate that to others.  Conveying to my son the importance of being able to ask for and communicate how support is a necessity for meeting the demands of this world.   Or, somehow be more positivie in getting him to name his disabilities to be succesful in this world be where I placed my resolve with him.
I believe that being politically correct and following the trends in Disability Advocacy is less important than doing what is needed.  I failed to listen to my son in his insistent of prefering to be identified as normal or not disabled.  What I hope to convey in this post is for you to understand you the authority on your child.  Try to listen to them and find a way to do what is needed without being afraid you are doing the right or correct way.
Become confident in yourself with regard to your child.  There are no better specialists on a child than their parent or Guardian.  Please learn from my mistakes.  Instead of helping my son name his disability, I conveyed to him that he is different or that I think he there is something wrong with him.  I am sure you know this was not my intent. Raising any child is scary. Trials and life associated with raising and planning for a child with extrodinary abilities is daunting. 
If you have advice to me, disagree with my slant on this or other; commenting is crucial to boost parents or those working with this population to teach them how to do this.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

“I DID NOTHING WRONG!”











Divorce I declare on November 25th of this year.
“If you stay I will comply!” you said.
Will my age be 95 when this I see and hear?
“I did nothing wrong!” I get all this junk from your head.
Reasonable I planned to be.
Setting some words in pencil.
Even when inside I hadn’t a “Yippee.”
Glad these words were not set in stencil.
One day a week exercise with an Fitness Instructor.
Find a church and attend.
Two times a month on Sundays I direct.
Wednesday I penned.
Date night,
Family night, time,
Couples therapy I write.
Family counseling I chime.
Tanner, a prime consideration.
We each have our own page.
While we need to tune to the same station.
Seems to me I parent around your rages.
Judge me plenty in this marriage.
If you are a Christian and fill in plenty of blanks.
Can we find a carriage,
To carry us where God ranks and we give thanks?
Whose is this baby?
Was your reply to my telling you of my pregnancy.
What does that imply to me maybe?
Great way to start the gestation.
Your way or the highway,
Has been how it seems
Our marriage a flyby,
My behavior says to you. Blowing to smithereens.
I am not lily white.
Marriage takes two.
Perfection is a quest that people must hold.  Allright I did bite.
After a bit, I bet we both blew.
Attention you want.
Tis not Tanner you are for him to prosper.
Only wanting to flaunt.
Called it Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy and like a cosper.
No to church choir.
Hated my enrolling in swimming, karate and many other sports.
Attention you said I wished to acquire.
Forbid me to run for PTA President, threatening me for some reason you’d report.
The house was always yours in title.
Shuffling aside the promise to buy a new house once married.
I didn’t do this or that which was vital.
How I felt as if I’d been buried.
When will you be home?
You were late.
Where is my tomb?
Was I mistake but your love appeared as if hate.
Plenty on our plate, for sure,
We must do,
In finding a cure,
After saying “I do!”
Already, you have stated the fitness instructor you aren’t ready for.
I, in good faith, agreed to remain for three months and try.
Let us remember it isn’t war.
Hope and faith should keep us from cries and saying bye.
Your barter was to walk the dog,
With me two or three times a week,
For 15 minutes to 30 minutes, A fog
Was not your state of mind or your critique.
One day you proclaim,
If it is going to be like this,
We won’t be part of the marriage game.
I pray we can find bliss.
You think I keep bringing up the past,
Nagging without forgiving.
However, there is a contrast.
Purposely, getting at anger thrown out isn’t how I will be living.
I asked you to write down your wants and desires.
Of all things I haven’t forgotten God first is a must.
We must put out many fires while relighting a major fire.
A wind gust of marriage thrust is needed that we trust.
Remember, telling me I couldn’t take Tanner
By himself on a vacation.
One big banner,
Is that I can do this type of migration.
Our marriage has lots of problems.
I promise to convey,
My love and earnest,
Struggle to succeed.
God states anything is possible
Through Christ.
Thinking we agree on most of the doctrinal,
Principles from the bible, we must pay the price.
Forgetting and forgiving,
Yes, I concur,
Without misgivings.
If you and I finally understand each other without it being a blur.
God, with faith,
We pray and ask,
To hear what you saith.
Vowing to endure any task.

Monday, December 22, 2014

You know you have a child with Autism when

#autism #autism humor #autism Christmas #Asperger's #High Functioning Autism #ADD #ADHD #Christmas Celebration #learning disabilities God

I decided to feel in this blank and the results were so amazing I am posting my feel in the blank answer.

For the humor side of autism.....You Know you have a child with autism...when at Christmas you are thinking of renting a child to open presents